Those who have been following me, may have noticed my blog going dark for a while, as did my Instagram profile. Last month I decided – rather impulsively – to quit this blogging thing and put everything back to private again. But today I am back, not to pick up where I left, but to keep moving forward with the changes I’ve experienced. Before I dive in to where I want to go, I wanted to tell you guys why exactly I decided to quit what I was doing.
1. The pressure
To me it kinda sounds like a weakness, but dealing with the social media pressure was hard. Before I never heard of Instagram algorithms and such, but once you get more into blogging, it’s inevitable. So posting, commenting and liking has to take up so much of your time if you want to grow an audience and that was something I just couldn’t implement in my life as it is. I have a full time job, as does my partner, two dogs and I don’t have a cleaning help anymore. Next to that I don’t have the ‘best body’ as I have an auto-immune deficiency (nothing serious), but that makes me tired most of the time. All these things may sound as excuses to you – trust me, they even sound as excuses to me – but it’s just how life is. So in order to keep enjoying life – ’cause hey, that’s the point of it – I had to take away some pressure.
2. Keeping up with the Joneses
Doing this ‘fashion-blogging-thing’ isn’t easy. Hell, it’s serious fast business because we are dealing with fast fashion after all. I constantly felt ‘behind’ since I wasn’t able to go out and shoot a certain new piece on the day it arrived and edit the pictures and write some amazing content next to it… because I have a full time job. I felt like I could only post about clothing I liked when it wasn’t even available in stores anymore. Plus, I had to invest a lot of money in clothing – didn’t really mind that one actually – to keep up with new things. So it all started to kind of feel like I was in some sort of treadmill, trying to keep up with others.
Yes, we all know comparison is the thief of joy blah blah, but it truly is. I was constantly seeking for inspiration at other blogs or magazines or whatever, constantly being confronted with people who are more beautiful, more energetic, have time to exercise with a personal coach, travel constantly, look tan, buy a dozen Chanel handbags, … and yes, you shouldn’t compare yourself to others, or you beginning to someone else’s middle, but let’s face it we do.
These were actually the three main reasons why this blog felt too much. But letting it go for over a month, did make me realize I need this place to share some thoughts and such. People who know me, know that I’m rather reserved and distant as a person/friend, but I do have thing I want to share with this world. So the focus of this blog will be shifted a little (or a lot).
1. More sustainable
I believe in the capsule wardrobe system and have been experimenting with minimalism for many years now, but I want to go towards a more sustainable and ethical lifestyle. I recently got two recommendations of a co-worker to watch/read, being The True Cost documentary and Eating Animals, a book by Jonathan Safran Foer. Having seen/read these two amazing pieces of work, I felt really bad about myself. About the way I’ve been living, putting others in so much harm by buying clothes and meat. After this, I can never go back to who I was, for they have changed me. I decided that having less, eating less (meat) is such a small offer to make to save this world. I will still be wearing clothes from fast fashion brands on this blog, because I have these clothes and getting rid of them for these beliefs would me hypocrite since that would be a waste. But I do no longer shop at fast fashion brands unless the purchase is well-thought about and I don’t find an alternative to it.
2. Focussing on what matters in life
Fashion isn’t really what matters in life. It’s a fun way to show ourselves to the world and I love the art of design, but it’s not something that should rule our worlds. That was a the problem with me, to be honest, I was obsessed by fashion. Constantly browsing for new thing, reading about it, … The focus will now first be my home, my dogs and my plants. After that I’ll think about this blog and I’ll still put some things out here.
So I don’t know if this blog will go somewhere and I’m trying not to focus on that anymore. Of course it would be great if I had over thousands of followers and a community I can relate to, but for now this is just a little piece of the internet that contains a little bit of myself.